Lunchtime used to be noon (that's why Grandpa called it "the noon meal"), then he decided that it should be four hours after he had breakfast, then it somehow became four hours after he got out of bed, which usually makes it 11:00 a.m. Now, at 10:45 or thereabouts, Grandpa calls out, "I'm getting faint!" which means "feed me, quick!" Today:
Grandpa: "I'm getting faint!"
me: typing on the computer, "Okay," didn't move
Grandpa: "Ohhhhhh..." (fake faint)
me: no time to respond, because less than a second later,
Grandpa: "OHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" (louder fake faint accompanied by drooping head and arms)
Sometimes the man has the patience of a saint, and sometimes he has the patience of a toddler.
After lunch, Grandpa banged his empty soup cup on the tray. I rolled my eyes, beleaguered soul that I am, and asked him what kind of pudding he wanted for dessert. "Lemon." As I fixed his pudding I thought about writing this post. When I handed him his pudding, I realized I'd given him chocolate instead of lemon. He accepted the mistake graciously. That'll teach him.